Things we wish existed in real life

Puppy hug kiosks and a mute button for real life? Just some of the things we've been dreaming about to make life a little easier

There are inventions that need to be made to make us all happier, and some rules and gadgets that need to exist to eliminate some of the stress from our lives. Here’s our list (Inventors and entrepreneurs, feel free to steal these ideas. You’re welcome.):

1. Ice-cream vans that also sell alcohol

Imagine a beautiful sunny day in Ireland, you’re sitting out or near the seaside and then you hear a little jingle. You rock up to the van and get a 99, or an ice cold pint of Bulmers, whichever takes your fancy at that moment in time. Just picture it.

2. Homer Simpson’s makeup gun, but a good one

For those days that you instantly need to look better but you know that it will take 30 minutes of blending and dabbing and eyelash curling for you to look semi-human.

3. An option to destroy emails and texts after they have been sent

There is NOTHING worse than sending a message to the wrong group, getting someone’s name wrong in an email or the dread of sending a message in a temper and wanting to take it back straight away. So many professional and personal relationships would be saved if there was an undo option.

4. A mute button for real life

It would be amazing to just be able to silence that person babbling about their wedding or your colleague making really loud personal phone calls or humming in the open plan office. Just like muting all the annoying incessant chatter of Whatsapp groups.

5. An office nap space* (Yes we know that Google has them but we can’t all be Googlers)

We all know naps make you feel better. We all know that work makes you tired. Surely, this would solve EVERYTHING. Can the Googlers confirm this? Thanks.

6. A nude lipstick that stays on your face/doesn’t make you look dead/actually does what lipstick is supposed to do

Same goes for matte lipsticks. They might make your lips look good for a second, but they don’t stay that way. They wear and they smudge and you just end up looking pasty with chapped lips. Why can’t the things we buy to make our lips look better make our lips look better?!

7. Washing machines and dryers that don’t shrink or destroy clothes

Cleaning your clothes should be as simple as washing dishes. You put the clothes in, they come out clean. No shrinking, no colour runs, no bally jumpers. Just picture it. Bliss.

8. Free mechanics

All cars break down and need repairs and it is always an unexpected expense that you really can’t afford right now. Imagine a world where if your car was broken you just got it fixed and drove off on your merry way, without having to lose your entire savings or holiday fund on a clutch or a timing belt or whatever? Everyone would be happier. If someone wins the Lotto they should provide this service rather than buying us an island. Way more practical, and then we could still afford our holidays!

9. An app that lets you book the parking space you want in advance

If you’re driving into town and want that spot right outside the dentist’s, why shouldn’t you be able to reserve it? Or the next nearest one? There’s nothing that makes stress levels rise as fast as driving around for a parking space.

10. For all weekends to be three day weekends

They make everyone so happy. We get so much more done. We can have a night out without losing 50% of our weekend to a hangover. We can go for brunch three days in a row. We wouldn't have Sunday night fear. It would be a perfect world!

11. A phone that doesn’t lose battery

Someone needs to make an iPhone and a 3310 have a baby and that phone baby will be a smartphone with an endless battery. We’re pretty sure that’s how upgrades work.

12. Puppy cuddle kiosks

You can get a coffee to go or a slice of pizza on the run but the ultimate pick me up would be a little cuddle from a cute puppy that you could hand back before you go off about your business.

13. A pause button

Imagine if you’re running late, or you smudge your eyeliner, or spill coffee on your top, and you could just press pause on your morning until you’ve got yourself sorted? Say goodbye to all those days you would have been on time if only insert-disaster-here didn’t happen.

14. That food was just food, not calories and fat and all sorts of consequences

It would be amazing to be able to eat what you want without stressing about salt levels, bad fats, sugar and the impact on your body in the long run. Food has become so stressful, and it would be amazing if pizza could just be that, a delicious food, not weight gain/heart attack/bad skin/indigestion waiting to happen.

15. An opt-out option for bad news days

Yes we all need to be engaged and aware of what is happening with the world but these days there is just too much. If, on a tough day or when we’ve simply had enough, we could choose for our social media feeds to just be puppy and cat videos, pictures of our pals on holidays and memes, instead of 30 articles in a row on Trump, then that would be amazing. Perhaps bad news should be given a curfew so we could all sleep better? There’s a thought.

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